Quarter 3: Week 5, Post B

"why Mom? why Mom? why did you Mom? tell us why Mom? why are you not to blame Mom? because you are to blame! you are! YOU ARE TO BLAME! no one but you Mom! you brought him here! you trusted him! how can we forgive you? Mom, why? WHY MOM? WHY MOM? WHY? WHY? WHY? WHY?..." (207).

This quote comes from Nikki about a month after her mother's murder. It's interesting to see her go through different stages of the grieving process. In this stage, she is clearly turning the blame for what happened on her mother. Even though Nikki knows deep down that her mother was not to blame for her own murder, she has to take her frustrations out somehow. So, she blames the easiest target: her mother. Her anger at Ward Lynch coupled with her regret that she couldn't prevent her mom's death boil up inside her and she eventually explodes. In this stage her sadness is overshadowed by her anger and frustration. Nikki's reactions to these feelings were intriguing in their intensity and ferocity. An entire page is devoted to expressing this anger, filled with "WHY?"'s. This is the most frustrating question for Nikki as she wonders why this terrible thing has happened to her, why she was the one to find her mother's body, and countless other "what if" questions. I hope Nikki can work through her anger at her mother and redirect it towards the true holder of the blame: Ward Lynch. I think she will only be able to pull herself together after she realizes that neither she nor her mother were to blame for the tragedy.